I think the title of the whitepaper did this but people like to ignore it

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Then why was the first thing stored in the blockchain is non monetary data

β€œThe Times 03/Jan/2009 Chancellor on brink of second bailout for banks.”

Pretty good point, the genesis block is very special and unspendable, but I see what you're saying

Then you might misunderstand that since there could be no previous block hash to include Satoshi did this as proof. It was monetary data in that respect. It was proof the Genesis block was not faked.

Cash --> Cache --> "a place to store valuable things"

Think, supply-cache, weapons-cache, data-cache.

Value is subjective, and ironically, cash leaks value more than anything; it's a very poor incarnation of a cache.

The word cash may have evolved from cache, but evolution generally happens for a reason. They are 2 distinct words. Bitcoin is not a P2P electronic cache system.

This evolution happened because the existing words "currency" & "dollar" weren't inspiring enough confidence in people, so the word "cache"was hijacked to imply "dollar means value."

Pretty shitty reason IMO. I consider satoshi's use of the word in the title a perpetuation of its confusing history.

Yes but money converges to one asset.