If I ever get dementia I want to wake up every day convinced I’m an intergalactic Time Lord in my latest regeneration aboard the Starship Enterprise on an away mission.

If I start to notice my cognitive abilities slipping I’m going to do everything I can to prevent it, but just in case I’m also gonna start sleeping with self-hypnosis tapes to help ensure that Future Me is the coolest damn space cadet with dementia anyone’s ever met.