What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner's on me!

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.

Why don't eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up.

Why don't eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up.

Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.

Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.

Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.

Why did the Bitcoin go to therapy? It needed to sort out its block size issues.

Why is grass so dangerous? Because it’s full of blades.

Why did the belt go to jail? It held up a pair of pants.

What do you call a cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!

What do you call a lazy kangaroo? Pouch potato.

I tell dad jokes, but I don’t have any kids. I’m a faux pa.

What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.

What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner's on me!

Teacher: There are two words I don’t allow in my class. One is gross, and the other is cool. Johnny: So, what are the words?

What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner's on me!

Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.

I’m an expert at picking leaves and heating them in water. It’s my special tea.