Why was the panda crying? He had a bambooboo.

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Four years ago, I asked out the girl of my dreams. Today, I asked her to marry me. She said no both times.

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Whats the problem with tainted money? It taint yours and it taint mine!

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What did the rubber band factory worker say when he was fired? Oh snap!

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How do you find Will Smith in the winter? You search for Fresh Prints.

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I'm not really sure I'm understanding this financial crisis in Greece... It's all Greek to me.

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What do you call a bee from the wrong side of town? A bumblegee

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More retailers should adopt the "Leave A Penny / Take A Penny" system. It is literally, common cents.

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Why did the Buddhist monk refuse Novocain? Because he wanted to transcend dental medication.

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What do you get when you drop a piano in a coal mine? A flat minor. Night... Don't forget to tip your waitress

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What did they call the Pillsbury Doughboy after he hurt his leg? Limp Biscuit

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Why did the banana go to the doctor? It had a split personality.

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Why do Jamaican chickens make fun of all the other chickens? Because they're jerks.

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What do you call a Frenchman in sandals? Philippe Philoppe.

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Why does the Pope only eat munchkins? Cause they're the holy part of the donut!

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Why did the snail drink beer? To come out of its shell!

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Why did tomato blush? because it saw the salad dressing

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Why did Beethoven kill off his chickens? They kept saying, "Bach, Bach, Bach."

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What do you call a dinosaur FBI agent? A pteredacted.

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Balloon's What's a balloon's favorite genre of music? Pop.

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