They told me I had type "A" blood... turns out it was a typo.
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Who is William Shatner's mythical nemesis? The Lepre-khaaaaannnnn!!!!!
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How many dancers does it take to change a lightbulb? 5,6,7,8
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Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a byte.
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Why do zombies always kill at comedy clubs? Because their jokes are told post-humorously!
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Schooner or later, sailors... engage in rudder nonsense.
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What do you call a very religious person who sleep walks? A Roman Catholic.
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Did you hear about the fight in the candy store? Two suckers got licked
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How do you get Pikachu on the bus? Poke 'em on!
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How do porcupines play leapfrog? Very carefully
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Why was the healthy potato not allowed on the plane? He was on the "No Fry" list.
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Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse" Says the first. "Moo!" says the second
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school? He wanted to go to high school.
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Why did the dog sleep on the chandelier? Because he was a light sleeper.
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I just met someone who was a steam-roller operator. He was such a flatterer.
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What color T-shirt would win a race? Red, because it runs the most.
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What did the bee use to get out the tangles? A honeycomb.
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What kind of bee will not take credit for his contributions? A Humblebee.
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