Why did the camera go to the doctor? It had a low light problem.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you can't pick your friend's nose

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What did the blue denims say to the black denims? I guess we have different genes!

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My friend's bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.

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What type of cheese lives under your bed? Muenster.

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What does Drew Carey have in his driveway? Cleveland Rocks!

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How much does a pirate earing cost? A buccaneer

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I was watching a TV program on various Religious orders and how the use stringed instruments. I was appalled by the amount of sects and violins!

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What does batman take in his whiskey? Just ice.

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I would make a sparrow joke... But they don't fly very well.

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What do you call a stegosaurus with carrots in its ears? Anything you want to - it can't here you!

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What song can never be played on #throwback Thursday? Friday by Rebecca Black

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a door. And a staircase. I don't think hes alright now.

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I was addicted to the hokey pokey but I turned myself around.

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Why did the wave fail the driving test? It kept crashing on the beach.

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What do you call an old soldier who has been sprinkled in salt and pepper? A seasoned veteran.

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What did one slice of bread say to the other at the end of a game of chess? "It's stale, mate."

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What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate? A candy baa

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My buddy said he'd give his right arm to be ambidextrous.

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why are there fences around graveyards? people are just dying to get in there these days.

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