What do you call... What do you call an Italian romance novel model who's let himself go? Flabio.
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Why don't robots have any brothers anymore? Because they have trans-sisters.
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totally original joke/first post: What do you get when you play a Frank Sinatra record at twice the speed? "Shrank Sinatra"
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I thought I had a brain tumor but then I realized it was all in my head.
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What did one snowman say to the other snowman? 'Do you smell carrots?'
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I went to the store and asked for a one handed sailor... he said sorry, "I'm a wholesaler."
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Why did the dog go into the water? Because he didn't want to be a hot dog.
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What the the electrician say to his buddy? Watts up?!
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Last night, I had a dream that I was walking on a white sandy beach... At least that explains the footprints I found in the cat litter box this morning...
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How much do drum shaped sofas cost? 5 dollars per-cushion.
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What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird.
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Always put sunglasses on your tree. Then, you'll get the proper shade.
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I'm good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet... I don't know why.
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My first joke here and an original! Did you hear about the two lawyers who set up shop under the old oak tree? I heard it was a pretty shady business.
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The other day, I was looking through my socks, when I found one had a hole in it... "darn it..." I muttered.
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What does a train full of grain's whistle sound like? "COUS, COUS!!!"
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Who was the most important Knight of the Round Table? Sir Cumference.
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What do ducks do at Christmas time? They ducker-ate cookies.
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What Time Do You Go To The Dentist? Tooth - Hurty!
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What is green, sings and can be found in the fridge? Elvis Parsley
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