There were two flies sitting on a toilet seat... one got pissed off.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
What is a pair of sheep's favorite instrument? Two-Baaas.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
I came up with a joke about my old cell phone Nevermind, it tends to get terrible reception
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
I dig, she dig, we dig, he dig, they dig, you dig ... Maybe not a funny joke but at least it is deep.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
I went out with anorexic twins last night... 2 birds, 1 stone
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
Superman and Eyore had a baby. The baby's name? Supereyore
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
What's an idealist vegetarian's favorite meal? Peas and hominy
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
What's a pirates favorite letter? You think it's the "R" but it's really the "C". Happy talk like a pirate day!
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
How does a fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales!
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
What did the hammer say to the drill? You're too boring.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
What do you get when you drop a piano in a coal mine? A flat minor. Night... Don't forget to tip your waitress
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
Why does not a forth-grader ever take the bus home? Because he knew his parents will make him return it.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
What's a balloon's favorite genre of music? Pop.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Because of the silent P.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
An idea for a board game... BONOPOLY - Similar to Monopoly, but where the streets have no name.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
The Fine Bros. 'React' announcement was like a television with no antenna. Poor reception.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
What did one dry erase marker say to the other? I'm bored!
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny
Cars Why do lazy people only drive automatics? Because they're shiftless.
- #zap this if you like to see more. #Joke #Funny