One Eskimo said to the other, "Where is your mother from?" The second Eskimo says "Alaska."
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Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
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Did you hear about the ointment... Did you hear about the ointment that couldn't stop talking about politics? When confronted, he said he was just trying to be topical.
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We now have TWO Wawa's by the interstate. The one on the east side of I4 is not so bad. But the other one, whoa. It's the Wawa West over there.
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How do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea.
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I have a lot of jokes about the unemployed... ...but none of them work.
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Why do sailors give their wives a bouqet of ropes instead of flowers?? It's a bouqet of forget-me-knots.
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A Thanksgiving Joke What did the turkey say about the television program from the 1950s? There's a little bit too much grayvy.
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What did the hot dogs name their child? Frank.
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What did the Tin Man say when he got run over by a steamroller? Curses! Foil again!
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Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse" Says the first. "Moo!" says the second
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What song can never be played on #throwback Thursday? Friday by Rebecca Black
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Apple just released a brand new programming language called Swift. Job recruiters everywhere immediately started posting ads for Swift programmers with 5 years of experience.
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What do you call a bear with no teeth? *A gummy bear.*
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What other body parts did Voldemort not have apart from his nose? His legs and arms.. because he was disarmed and defeated.
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Why did the wave fail the driving test? It kept crashing on the beach.
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Why did the paper follow the pencil? Because it LED THE WAY!
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What do you call a dinosaur FBI agent? A pteredacted.
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I have to find a new personal trainer. He didn't do squat(s).
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I just read this article about short term memory I don't remember what it was about
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