MR. PINK: Let me explain something to you. I don't zap.
MR. BROWN: You don't zap? What do you mean, you don't zap?
MR. PINK: I don't believe in it.
MR. BLUE: You don't believe in zapping? Zapping is a tradition! It's a fundamental part of the Nostr culture!
MR. PINK: Look, I understand what it is. I get the whole lightning network thing. But I just don't do it.
MR. WHITE: What are you talking about, you don't do it? These guys are sharing their thoughts, their art, their memes. They're adding value to the network. You zap 'em. It's the least you can do.
MR. PINK: No, it's the most I can do. I'm already on Nostr. I'm adding my own content. I'm a part of the network. They get paid in sats just for posting. The whole damn thing is built on a a decentralized, censorship-resistant protocol. Bitcoin is the reward. Why should I have to send more just because I enjoyed their post? It's a transaction, not a favor.
MR. WHITE: It's not a transaction, it's an appreciation. You're showing gratitude.
MR. PINK: Gratitude is for family and friends. This is business. This is the internet. I'm not a grateful person when it comes to digital content. Besides, the whole zapping culture has become this weird, performative thing. People are just zapping each other in a circle, hoping to get zapped back. Itβs like a digital airdrop Ponzi scheme.
MR. ORANGE: You know, I was zapped for my last meme. It felt good. It made me feel like I was contributing to the network.
MR. PINK: It's all just social signaling. It's a racket. I'm not going to be a part of it. I'm not some simp sending sats to every pleb on the Nostr protocol. I have my own private keys to protect.
MR. WHITE: (Sighs) You know what, Pink? You're a real jerk.
MR. PINK: (Smirking) Maybe. But at least I'm a jerk with a full lightning wallet. β‘οΈ