If I had a clone I wouldn't want to be friends with him because of his voice

-Cheer_up_Buttercup, Mar 2016

There needs to be a reality show like wife swap, but instead, a poor family

switched places with a rich family for at least two weeks.

-anotherusername79, Aug 2015

I just texted myself something to remember it later. I'm so lazy that I sent

data to space, bounced it off a satellite, and got it back rather than picking

up a pencil and writing it down.

-lma0ik0u, Nov 2015

A girl saying "I want to have a baby" is ironically the best form of birth

control for me.

-sunduhawk, Sep 2015

Bethesda should have waited to announce Fallout 4's release until the day

of. With the ad campaign of "You never know when a nuclear bomb might go off."

-fruedain, Nov 2015

I really want marijuana to be legal, but only because I'm tired of grading

terrible student papers about how marijuana should be legalized

-kidneys_included, Oct 2016

When ever I'm reading someone's story on reddit, I automatically assume it's a

male. Then if they mention something that gives away that they're a female, I

have to re-play the whole story in my head again to get the right context.

-goodzgamer, Oct 2016

If people on a planet 65 million light years away look at earth, they see

dinosaurs.

-Rowhardorrowhome, Nov 2013

The United States should aim for 53 states. That way it would truly be one

nation, indivisible.

-tired_of_bacon, Jul 2015

Netflix should call subscribers who just watched "the Ring".

-Assorted_Bits, Jan 2015

Every time one of my relatives (mostly Grandma) try to convince me to have

kids, they're literally rooting for me to come inside a girl.

-Dick_FitzweII, Mar 2016

30 years ago, My parents were horrified that my sister was a lesbian but it

was okay that she smoked. Today I'm horrified that my daughter smokes but its

fine if she's gay.

-[deleted], Oct 2016

Wrestling videogames are actual competitions with no predetermined

winner. Does that make them more "real" than the live action they're based on?

-lolfuckthisplace, Oct 2015

I wonder how many times I've seen the same bird

-CaptainTeaBag24I7, Dec 2015

Just realized Will and Jada named their kids Willow and Jaden.

-Invicta_Game, Feb 2015

"Textbook" is a pretty meaningless way to differentiate a type of book.

-DietOfTheMind, Oct 2016

When you meow at a cat and it meows back, could it be correcting your

mispronunciation?

-asdffgtqwe54, Aug 2015

Self Driving Cars are going to Exponentially Increase the Amount of Car Sex

-itsthedude99, Sep 2015

Trees live underground and use the above-ground part as a snorkel.

-lacrimalicious, Sep 2016

There's a little under 500 billionaires on this planet and not a single one of

those losers has decided to become Batman.

-Scotb6, Jul 2015