At one point in my life, I was exactly pi years old.

-Sousaphoney, Jun 2015

All terms and conditions should be required to provide a tl;dr

-BuddyEndsleigh, Jul 2016

If you were to walk around the earth, your head would travel a significant

distance farther than your feet.

-lemonsandpickles, Jul 2015

Does anybody else randomly zones out while reading, coming up realizing you

don't know what happened in the last two paragraphs?

-dumbostrich, Oct 2016

I wonder how many people's heartbeats are perfectly in sync right now?

-TheHeroicOnion, May 2016

The first rule of fight club is what prevented the movie from getting spoiled

to me for the last 15 years

-FiachB7, Feb 2015

If you're over 30, you were alive before every dog in the world.

-jleonardbc, Apr 2016

Why did the Empire bother to compact their garbage if they just ejected it

into space anyway?

-AMeanCow, Oct 2014

If my dream girl exists, I'll never meet her because she prefers to chill at

home

-pupuwalker, Feb 2016

In space reverse cowgirl and doggy are the same thing

-alberpopov, Sep 2016

By the time artificial intelligence will know how to pass the Turing Test, it

will also know how to fail it.

-mrtouchyfeely, Apr 2016

Patriotism is not about loving your country blindly. It is about accepting its

flaws and solving them little by little

-Gerakison, Aug 2016

Sleep is like a 33% tax on life.

-Shipwreck_Kelly, Jun 2016

I hope I never go to jail. I haven't memorized a phone number since 2002.

-donniesf, Dec 2015

Cinderella must have had some fucked up feet if her slipper didn't fit anyone

else's foot in town.

-I_cant_speel, May 2014

The creators of "How It's Made" should make a show about "How the Hell They

Discovered That", with the origin stories of food creations, inventions, and

flubs along the way

-yomifrackle, Mar 2015

The trees planted on city sidewalks should be replaced with fruit trees, so

the homeless have something to eat in the summer and fall.

-[deleted], Oct 2015

Two people could be born at exactly the same time, but have different

birthdays due to the timezones.

-Maximuso, Jul 2013

People say cell phones are ruining youth, but youth are reading more then ever

because of them

-[deleted], May 2016

Now that I'm an adult, if I ever found a portal to Narnia in my closet I would

probably start storing things in Narnia. I imagine building a large storage

shed on Narnia property. I wonder if zoning would be an issue...

-bmorebeardly, Jan 2016