Replying to Avatar AnnSofiNovelist

I grew up in Sweden where the tradition isn't baby showers, but rather, once the baby is born, people would go visit and bring a gift for the baby. (I think within the first year of it's life or something)

I've technically been to 3 baby showers in America. 🤰🥳

The first one was at the ministry school I attended and my groups leaders put one together with silly games like changing a diaper on a doll, and naming the baby food.

The second one was during the lockdowns, so I was able to join from Sweden and be on the same level as everyone else. They had some games like guess how much the mom's belly had grown or her weight or something (all in imperial, so I skipped those 😅) and then they opened gifts.

The third one was for one of my sister-in-law's, and in person! The only game they had was a fun questioner about babies, including, "what bones are babies born without," leaving 3 options, where knees were the correct answer.

As we're coming up on our first baby's birth, I'm not quite sure what to do. I'd love to have a baby shower, but our closest local friends are the baristas at Starbucks, and some frequent guests there. Not exactly close connections.

We live far away from everyone else, so I'm thinking of doing something online.

One idea I had was to actually have 3 separate baby showers. One for my Swedish relatives and friends, one for my American relatives and friends, and one for your guys, my friends here on Nostr!

Would any of you be interested in joining a Nostr baby shower?

There's a Nostr live streaming service called Hive Talk that's similar to Zoom, but I don't think it has the same limitations of time and guests, and doesn't actually require anyone to login, so if you'd like to keep your face separate from your normal npub, that wouldn't be a problem. Also, wives can join!

I know there aren't a ton of wives on here, but they might be interested in joining a Nostr baby shower 🤗

If you have any ideas or suggestions, or this is something you'd be interested in joining, please let me know! 😃

Could this be nostr's first baby shower?

nostr:nevent1qqsqy056sg8yrf2q50yx5cx6588h7e8nhf3hd4a9w9e2rsxfmgryl9gpzamhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuurjd9kkzmpwdejhgtczypec77rn4skxedmsrcc4qct2ljpyx7d3x26x0wj6ss5at9j27xcnvqcyqqqqqqgv5jgpy

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I think it might be! 🤔🤗

A lot of bitcoiners have babies, but since baby showers seem to be mostly for women and there aren't a ton of women on Nostr, it may not have been tried before!

Since men are totally a part of being parents too, I think baby showers should include men! 🤰💁‍♂️👶

That's logical. 🤔

I think people don't throw baby showers on nostr because baby showers are for your support network to come together to provide resources (ahem, gifts) for the new parents upcoming life change.

People usually don't throw baby showers for themselves because it's considered tacky so that adds a layer of barrier to entry since a nostr baby shower would probably be thrown by your nostr bestie. Like you said, there arent many women on nostr so people aren't close enough to do that.

But hey, it's nostr. It's a free world out here. you can do whatever you want 😆

This makes sense.

As you say, it's about the support network, and to be honest, I've gotten more good advice from people on Nostr than in real life.

Most people I know in person are all still wrapped up in fiat land, so I don't really trust their suggestions 😅 there is some good stuff in there, but a lot of it is compliance based rather than verified with truth.

pregnancy and baby advice is sometimes informed by too many old wives tales but I think people are more and more focused on science based parenting these days which is nice.

In my experience, its good to be informed by science and the studies that have been done by early development people but also do things your own way.

I looked up some information from a Swedish site, and they actually share WHY they do things. A lot of the American sites only say to do things, but don't mention why.

The fact that American hospitals normal practices include STD gel on babies eyes, unless specifically told not to put that on, plus all the vaccines they prop babies filled with, like the hepatitis vaccine as new borns, is ridiculous.

I'm not 100% again vaccines, but I'm not interested in simply going along with everything they say, since some of it is clearly idiotic 😅 so, then I wonder what else is based on the same type of non logic. 😬

I've found it's more likely to meet people who have studied these things in the bitcoin community, as bitcoiners tend to be truth seekers, and they want to have lots of kids, and some already do, and thus has done some of the necessary study already. 😊

Do you have kids? Do you know any good resources to get healthy and true information from? 😃

I have one 18m old and I'm pregnant with twins right now, due in August.

Most of my study revolves around early development and behavior. I'd recommend reading Your Self Confident Baby by Magda Gerber (not related to Gerber baby food) and there's a book that very science informed book for pregnancy with multiples called When You're Expecting Twins, Triplet or Quads.

what about you? any resources you've come across?

Wow, congratulations!!!

I've got the possibility of twins, but I'm happy to be starting with one. It's a more manageable option I think, but we want lots of kids, so twins would be great! 😊

Thank you for the recommendations! I've mostly focused on the actual birth so far. I read a cool study about dates, so I'll be eating 6 dates per day for the last 4 weeks to assist with a faster and easier labor and birth.

For more technical information, I looked up 1177.se and searched pregnancy. I then realized they also have English translations so my husband can understand too, but it's kind of janky as a lot of Swedish still shows up. 😅

But it told me why, and not just what.

My advice when it comes to labor and delivery is to take a class if you can. One of the things I was grateful for was that I had a chance familiarize myself with interventions like induction, c-section, vacuum assist, epidural, episiotomy, breech birth, and etc.

The hope is that you follow the ideal birth where you go into labor, you dilate, you push a couple times and then the baby comes out fast and easy.

I hope you get the birth that you want, I really do. When it comes down to it, there will be things outside of your control and you may have to make decisions or accept interventions for the sake of a healthy baby. Having knowledge of those things happening will make it less scary in the moment.

Also, take a breastfeeding class if you can! Find a local breastfeeding support group or organization so you will have help when the baby is here.

good luck! feel free to ask me anything