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i was thinking of a way to respond to this, but really, this is a completely valid and understandable answer.

there were times when i failed to ensure that my partner's, my Wife's, safety was a priority. not because i was loud, or aggressive, or violent, but because i wasn't present emotionally.

and sometimes i wonder if She had a similar thought: that She'd feel safer without me. that failure is something that i have to carry forever. and all i can do is wake up everyday and do my best to make sure She never has a thought like that going forward.

thanks for sharing <3

Vezire 6mo ago

It's really beautiful that you're being so considerate toward your partner. When both people in a relationship truly care for and prioritize each other’s well-being and sense of safety, I believe things can work out well.

Unfortunately, I’ve had partners who showed aggression and jealousy. I’ve always disliked conflict. I just can't handle it. Those experiences were painful and left a deep impact on me. That’s why I’m extremely cautious now, and honestly, I often prefer being alone.

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Discussion

purrs_for_Her 6mo ago

it is unfortunate that you had bad experiences like that. my Wife and i were both very lucky to find each other.

She feels the same as you about conflict, which is why i think She was open to an FLR—it allows Her to set the pace of the relationship and be the architect of a space that feels safe without having to make Herself small.

thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences, and thank you for the kind words. :3