im just sayin, you do not get to have a ruthless security in your own sense of self and what you are willing to sacrifice if you dont even think about it

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isnt only about ruthlessness

also can be about pre-emptively finding compromise inside yourself in advance of this hypothetical scenario.

like: a bottle in me? absolutely not.

but, depending on this suddenly revealed core center of your partner's kinkland

what about a hand

cos like yo. there is at least complicity then. at least ~we~ are going to the ER and suffering this together and ~you~ are the idiot.

cos if we go down we go down together could be enough to make something acceptable

cos what are they gonna do? cut off their own hand to spare themselves the embarrassment they are fine causing you? well, then owing to a sudden loss of blood in that hand can probably get it unstuck.

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generally speaking,

things are less shocking,

more able to keep wits,

more helpful in an emergency,

if you have already played out something even tangentially related before

to me: a good partner does not let their partner commit crimes against them without making sure their partner is going down with the ship too

cant let your partner be evil to you

"baby you are so safe with me i will never let you ever be abusive towards me and in kind, i trust the same is true for you to me.

and if our monsters ever unleash on eachother or the world, may they take us out by firing squad while we hold hands."

tell me that isnt a fucking vibe