If that is the situation and my neighbor is also mocking me for being lazy and poor and a number of other character flaws then the neighbor is still a dick. I'm blaming the them for how they behave to me about the situation because that is within their control.
I can both complain about the mafia and my dick headed neighbor. I choose to spend my time not doing that for the most part, but if someone else is I might chime in like, yep, the mafia sucks and wouldn't it be nice if the neighbors weren't dicks.
Which is what happened in this conversation. Do you think tone policing how this conversation happens makes the neighbors less dick headed or the mafia less criminal or makes the folks who are complaining feel heard or helps them not be taken advantage of by the mafia or dick headed neighbors? Why do you feel compelled to do so, what is the utility here?