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Homeschooling was the best decision I've ever made.

One of the best things about homeschooling is it allows customization to optimize education to each kid's individual strengths, weaknesses, and interests. You can spend extra time to make sure they understand the things that are difficult, so they don't lose the foundation they need for other learning. You can rush through the things they pick up quickly and not waste their time on endless repetition. When you find something that is interesting, you can take a deep dive into that area and learn a lot. There is nothing that kids will learn better or faster than something they find interesting.

It is funny when you ask a homeschooled kid what grade they are in. Sometimes they just look at Mom questioning, but most of the time the answer is something like, "Well I am in 9th grade for Math, 8th grade for History, 8th grade for English, and 11th grade in Science." They can be at the right level for themselves in each individual subject rather than being forced to be at a certain level based on their age. The right level for any particular subject may be above or below the government school level.

Since homeschooling is customized for each kid, it is also amazing if you have a gifted kid and/or a special needs kid. I have both. My gifted kid has been reading at the college level since 2nd grade and we studied relatavistic physics for fun the summer between 8th & 9th grade. He does have trouble with handwriting so we did handwriting through 8th grade, but even in elementary school, he did papers on the computer because handwriting was so difficult for him that he couldn't compose properly if he had to handwrite. My youngest son has down syndrome, is 16, but uses mostly 2nd & 3rd grade material. He has grown so much since I brought him home (for 8th grade). Nothing I used with my gifted son works with my special needs son and vice versa, but both have thrived greatly. I also have a wonderful relationship with both.

Homeschooling wasn't just good for my kids. It was wonderful for me. I got to relearn/unlearn what I had learned in school. I have a great relationship with my boys. I have the pride of seeing my oldest leaving in a few weeks and knowing he is totally ready to be on his own.

#grownostr #homeschool #gifted #specialneeds #downsysndrome

Not my name 2y ago

Homeschooling seems like a reasonable option if you have children.

The devils advocate position though would be that you are catering to your children’s individual needs in a society that will do anything but. Society doesn’t care (nor should it in my opinion) that you have one son who is special needs and one who is gifted. That’s your problem as their parent, not mine as a tax payer. So are you really preparing them for the real world? Maybe but most likely nothing you do as a parent will matter in the end. Sorry. That said, I certainly don’t blame you and instead commend for trying.

I can say that the far simpler solution may be to just not bring humans into existence in a world that is already over run by the other 8 billion of us.

Sorry if this is a downer but you will likely be otherwise assuaged in your views as a parent by the others here on #Nostr.

I maintain that the whole point of #nostr though is to experience the uncensored points of view of others who think differently from us.

If it helps, I readily concede that I, like you, haven’t the slightest clue if I am right or wrong about anything.

#childfree

#thinkdangerously

#grownostr

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Discussion

BitBees 2y ago

Happily childless with friends who also made this choice. I have an autistic godchild. Homeschooled kids I know are always ahead of their peers and respectfu, productive sovereign individuals, in my experience.

Not my name 2y ago

Agreed. As flawed as it may be, it seems like a far better option than the bullshit public or private options out there.

LibertyGal 2y ago

My actions will make both more productive than they would otherwise have been and taught them to compensate for their weaknesses. What I have done will make them less, not more of a burden on society and yes, it does matter. It matters a lot.

Not my name 2y ago

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news again, but one bad decision by an otherwise perfect kid can kill or maim them just as easily as one raised by bad parents. That is to say nothing about the other abuses they will suffer as regular members of society.

It’s sad to think about but that doesn’t change reality.

By having kids, you are gambling with someone else’s life. You may be improving the odds by putting in effort as a parent, but the risks are all still non-zero.

Luffy 2y ago

nostr:npub1l07hhrxr9jpnu37pq7pm9qvk9nlvdzefmqvxlsrlnv2caq0zeqcsqvtmj2 Right, risks are there. But that is the essence of life isn't it??. Evolution happens due to chances. You wouldn't want to reduce risk to zero nor could you.

We live within a random series of events. We put routines in place which help us feel like we have control over our lives. But actually we are more governed by chance than anything else as I see.

Regarding having children or not. Well that's another discussion in itself but the problems of the world seem to relate more to money printing than population. Would we have climate change if we didn't have money printing? After all money printing allows the consumption of tomorrows resources today. Would we have wars if citizens had to pay for it directly from their own pockets? Probably not. of course citizens pay in another way via inflation. That's the power of bitcoin there.

Finally with regards to homeschooling. Well institutional schooling is a relatively new concept. Couple of hundred years. Before that parents always taught their kids. I think if a life exists due to our actions, we should take responsibility for it. Giving the child to an overbearing system that doesn't share your values is the easy way out actually. I fully get not everyone can homeschooled but I take my hat off to anyone that does.

I hold hope for AI bots supplementing teaching in a more customised way.

Not my name 2y ago

Thank you very much for the reply.

I promise I will get back to you. Just don’t have the time right at the moment. Or more precisely, a reply will require more time than I have at the moment. :)

Not my name 2y ago

Ok. Just got back from a lovely trip but had a hectic travel day yesterday. That said, I was delighted to see your reply.

I was also delighted to read through some of your other posts and find that there are topics of general agreement and some otherwise, but all seemed both well-reasoned and communicated.

It is a singular pleasure to come across profiles like yours, and to see that some seem to be in this for the chance to connect with others who have different points of view.

I maintain my primary position that I don’t know shit about fuck, and that neither does anyone else. All we can do as humans is try to find the best path forward for ourselves without screwing over anyone else (or at least as few others as possible).

Regarding the topic at hand, I think we both agree that homeschooling seems like the better, although imperfect in its own right, option for shepherding children into adulthood. I 100% agree that the duty should fall more squarely on the shoulders of those who bore them into existence, and not those who the government must coerce to fund overpopulation and unrealistic perpetua growth strategies.

The topic of having children itself though, is a much more nuanced one as you suggest. We could go on for pages about the merits of each side of the argument, and I appreciate your point about whether a better money could lessen the impact of overpopulation, but I maintain that the planet would still have too many humans on it, even with perfect money.

The end point of the best conversations I’ve had about whether or not to have children seems to be a fundamental difference between those who think life itself has value and those who think it doesn’t.

As someone who has a spectacular life (and I mean that, I am extremely happy by both objective and subjective measurements) but also would rather have never been born, I am very clearly on the side that doesn’t see human life as anything special. Where I do place value is on human suffering, which unlike happiness or contentment, is nearly limitless. My goal then is to avoid human suffering at all costs since I see life itself as meaningless, and that starts best by not making more humans in the first place.

Anyway, I would appreciate hearing your thoughts on this but understand that not all can choose to think about this topic. I readily admit that it is a difficult one for parents since coming to the conclusion that having a child was a “mistake” (for lack of a better word), would produce far too much dissonance. It isn’t like you can undo having children and I get that.

So much obliged again for the reply, and and I’ll throw you a follow and a zap for sure.

LibertyGal 2y ago

You seem to want to avoid suffering at all cost, but sometimes the greatest growth happens through suffering and difficulty. We learn more and grow more through difficult times than through easy/enjoyable times. This is true whether you are talking about an individual or a nation or mankind in general. You can see that through the massive downturn in civilization (and morals) that has occurred in the past 50 years. All of the economic and technological growth caused ease (most people didn't have to worry about where there next meal would come from anymore, but instead worried about whether their preferred entertainment would be available or if they might have to hear an opposing viewpoint). Earlier in American history, when times were truly tough, people were happier and grew in wisdom and strength.

In my personal life, I had a string of horrible circumstances happen that led to me being better off (and a greater faith in God). My hot water heat pipes burst flooding the entire downstairs of my house. We had to have giant fans running 24/7 for 6 weeks and the whole downstairs was flood cut. Insurance wanted to only pay 60% of the cost of repairs. We had to get a lawyer to get a settlement to pay 90% of the cost after 9 months of fighting and living in horrible circumstances. As soon as we got the check, we changed insurance companies. Ten days later our house burnt to the ground with not one thing surviving (Fire caused by city employees). Within one month, the new insurance company had paid for the house, the trees, the barn, and a year's rent for while we rebuilt. A month later our car engine burnt up.

A month later my husband ruptured his Achilles tendon. Our rental house had the bedroom and family room on the same level and only a few feet away. The house that burnt down had the bedroom upstairs and very steep/narrow steps and the family room downstairs. We had also had an electric recliner donated to us. Recovery was so much better in the rental house than it would have been in the house that burnt down.

With the extra money from the original settlement and the full payment from insurance, we were able to build our dream home, designed for every stage of life (and in a very fire proof manner) and wind up with a paid off house. We are all better off having been through those hard times than before. Not one member of the family, if given the opportunity to go back and avoid the fire and flood, would chose to do so. We are stronger mentally and as a family than before the hard times and we have more consideration of others going through hard times and can be an encouragement to them.

I would never give up the hard times even if given the chance.

techfeudalist 2y ago

No, the world is not overpopulated. Each person brings new ideas and some of those become innovations that improve standards of living for all.

Children are the greatest blessing. People who view life as meaningless have nothing to live for because they have no purpose. Every parent knows what their purpose is.

Not my name 2y ago

Let’s hope for your children’s sake that you are right! :)

You sure seem to think you are.

I personally could never be so sure of anything as to risk someone else’s life on my “faith”. What happens if having kids is just another in the myriad expressions of human vanity and narcissism? Surely adoption grants the same purpose no?

techfeudalist 2y ago

Yes, I’m thinking adoption would provide the same purpose. I hope you’ll find your purpose, whatever it may be.

Not my name 2y ago

I think I understand where you’re coming from, and I agree that difficulty and challenge can provide valuable perspective.

But where is the value or perspective for example in early onset malignancy that produces spinal osteosarcomas that impinge on a 6 year old’s peripheral sensory nerves leaving them crying in agony during months of agonizing “treatments” and surgeries because the parents couldn’t come to terms with the fact that their child was dying?

There are limits to perspective being a good thing. Sometimes life is just plain fucking awful and unfair.

LibertyGal 2y ago

By the way, I also like a friendly, honest debate with someone I disagree with. Sometimes I learn something new and change my mind. Sometimes I strengthen my own belief and argument because I find more facts supporting my view during the debate. I also like knowing how and why other people think the way they do. All in all, I am better off.

Unfortunately very few people are willing, or even capable, of having a logical and friendly debate. Most people think a person who disagrees is an enemy. Most of the time a person who disagrees just disagrees. There should be no animous.

Not my name 2y ago

100% agree :)