One of the problems with chronic pain (and associated sadness) is that humans seem to be wired to avoid it. So often, talking about your own pain and sadness has the opposite effect of the one wished, compassion, or maybe even help. Instead you generate isolation.

Could be your own mother, your friends, your partner… at first there is a (fake?) level of compassion, mostly words. Then begins avoidance (first of the subject in the discussions, then in the physical realm)… the gaslighting (you’re not that unwell, we all have pain). The result is physical and emotional isolation.

So you end up seeing a psychologist to have at least one person validate your human experience. The psychologist conforts you that there is nothing wrong with your brain, you just lack a support system. Ah, good, that solves it.

Hiding behind a keyboard and a persona is comforting, but it does jack shit. My life has been shrinking and shrinking and shrinking… might as well be honest about it.

Sorry plebs, tough day… tough week… tough years…

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Discussion

A lot of people in chronic pain have a heavy presence on the internet - whether it be to fill an empty mental space or to yield substance from time spent. It’s a cup that never runneth, though.

I guess we go an try to find life where we can live it.

I did & it was lovely. This is really tough to hear, yet so simple: it just starts by stepping outside the home & doing something nice for yourself.

That last part is the hardest, I don’t think I remember how to. Also, I grew tired of doing it alone. I attempt to reconnect or connect to new people but I am on the spectrum as they say and it’s not always easy. Maybe some people are not meant to be part of the pyramid, they can pretend from time to time, but are mostly there to watch it from afar.

I’m so sorry it’s hard for you.

Just go for it & do it!

For me, it’s stepping out to my local Brooklyn cafe & getting a Dirty Chai Latte. From there, it’s all smiles & then it gets the blood flowing to regain excitement to do bigger things.

Little by little.

Difficult day, will speak with more hope tomorrow. I guess I needed to stop using Nostr to avoid the sadness and just process it.

If all goes well, tomorrow I am making music. That usually gives me a recharge to fight through the incoming BS.

Thank you for your time, for spending it near me in a difficult moment. Truly appreciated 🫂💜

Any time sweet friend. Here’s a zap too ⚡️⚡️⚡️⚡️ I don’t like to hear when someone I like is sad 🥲

I’ve been there. & music?!!?!!! Me too!!! I’d love to hear all about your music! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

Oh my, oh my wait until you understand what they are cooking over at #[3]​

Do you write? Perform? Instrument, electro, vocals… I want to know!!!

I would still love to know 😉

I do all of the above!

I own a record label here in New York, where I’m from.

I sing, produce, dance, act, paint, all things related Fine & Performing Arts/the Arts.

Any project that comes my way in regards to music or film, I love to collaborate on 💕❤️

I think it’s so amazing you’re multi-lingual. I can’t write in several languages, but I can sing Opera in several.

🙌

I’ll go hunt for your music when I come back from my lil walk

My previous professional life was all about filmmaking and media production education. Attempting my own feature length documentary kind of broke the camel’s back health wise, it was the beginning of the capitulation.

You can sing opera!?! 😍

Ok, this is good! 😉

#[4]​ could you onboard #[3]​ please? (If she wishes to…)

Stemstr aims to become the GitHub of music making, a place to foster collaboration. He can explain better than I do…

Happy to #[4]​! Hey #[3]​ check your DMs whenever you have a moment! 💜

This is me (just a session mix, wip) I am writing in English, French and Italian but only have this one recorded from new batch/new style for now.

https://youtu.be/ptKKLYioauQ

Ok, this is cool!

Thanks! Urban schizo poetry. I have 4-5 voices I mix and blend depending on mood of the song.

(when you’re back of course

take your time)

The internet isn’t that serious ;)

🫂

🫂

I appreciate your honesty. Most people out there are pretending, probably trying to fool themselves before they fool anybody else.

And I honor you allowing yourself to feel bad when you feel bad. That's one big ingredient that saved me, contrary to the popular beliefs out there.

Avoiding our emotions seem to only make them louder, as if they were shouting NOW FUCKING LISTEN TO ME!

I feel you.

I felt tired of doing it alone for a long time. Still now at times. But just take one small step whenever you feel more motivated to do it. Things turn out to be better after a while. 💖💖

A bit emotionally drained at the moment after offloading so let me just say this

🫂💜

As someone who takes strong painkillers almost every day due to chronic migraines and lower back pain, I totally understand how you feel. Thanks for being open and honest. 🙏🏻

🫂💜

Being honest and open is my way. Thought it could lead me to good places, for now only lead me to difficult tests. We’ll see what the future holds, if anything.

I’m sorry man. 💜🫂

🫂💜

This!!! 👇👇👇

#[0]

Sending love your way #[1]​ 🫂💜 here if you'd ever like to talk - just a DM away

Thanks 🫂💜 what I really need to have right now is the key to the spaceship (recording station) and go spit! I used to have my own station wired there, but removed it to reduce my share of the rent.

I wrote and posted it because I needed to process the emotions, but also because I know that there are others like me here, keeping their mouth shut and suffering in silence.

I'm really glad you posted, brother 🙏 I wrote and rap for the same reasons. Helps to deal with pain, trauma, sadness, etc. How do you record now that you don't have access to the studio?

I don’t. I am at the mercy of my mate’s timetable (and he got 4 kids). I need him there with me anyway to be honest, he’s really good and guiding the process and finding harmonies for the melodic bits.

Appreciate you sharing 🫂💜🤙

Reminds me a bit of the conversation #[2]​ #[3]​ and other frens had in #nostrnests.

I’d encourage you to keep sharing and as #nostr grows my hope is more people will find they are not alone and relate to your situation.

#zap and 💬 don’t feel enough but all I can do right now 🫂💜🤙.

The 💬 is the most appreciated 🫂💜

🫂

I’m experiencing some of this myself. Flat feet runs in my family. Well, it doesn’t exactly run, because I’m unable to run. I walk a lot, and I began developing a form of arthritis in my left big toe a few years ago. I’ve had to train myself to walk a certain way to avoid causing discomfort. I use orthotics, but it only helps so much. Sure, I could get surgery, but I’d need months of recovery and physical therapy, so I’ve been avoiding it. I’m not sure when I’ll have the time and motivation to try to take care of it.

Chronic pain and humor go hand in hand (foot in foot?) 🤣

See, we live a world where we cannot find time and energy to take care of ourselves even when we know how we could do so. Something gotta change

Yes 🙌

Can see how #bitcoin helps by giving us our time back or at least more control over it.

Because there’s only one thing that’s more valuable and scarce than #bitcoin: Time. And never ever are bitcoin & nostr going to fix this if we don’t take a break and find time for ourselves and for fixing our mental and physical health 🙃

🎯

Thanks for sharing 🙏

Keep going a step 🦶 at a time 🫂💜🤙

🤣

TY 💜🫂

🫂💜🤙

You are important and cared about. Thank you for being open and vulnerable. 🫂

I totally feel this.

With MS I have been experiencing that same effect. It is 100% not just you but anyone with chronic pain. The isolation is unbelievable 😔.

I am starting a chronic pain Nostr Nest support group and think it would be a great place for people like us to get together and discuss these difficulties we share. The common human experience is essential to our mental health.

I'll keep you posted on exactly when this will be as I try to find enough people to make it happen.

Interested?

Followed 🫡 enough suffering alone each in our little corner

🫂💜

This is what I am striving for

💜🫂🫂

Thanks for sharing so openly. I understand exactly what you're referring to.

Often times these patterns of discomfort are rooted in needs that weren't met during our childhood and they just repeat over and over until we learn to parent ourselves (for lack of a better way to explain it).

The Presence Process by Michael Brown helped me a lot in catching an dissolving these patterns. Might be worth checking out.

You're not alone 🙏

You must be onto something…

There is the pain and there is the suffering. They are not the same. When I am kinder with myself, there is less suffering.

A story for another day, but I have lived 3 days absolutely pain free a few months ago (the weeks after that were extremely difficult having tasted briefly « a normal life » )

I was in contact with something special, your pfp makes me think that maybe you know what I am talking about…

Yeah could be. The links in my bio may confirm that 🙂

I am not sure exactly the type of pain you've been experiencing, but I had chronic siatica for about four years. I was taking between 4 and 6 aleve every day and missing out on a lot of activities.

I was constantly worried about making it worse. I tried all kinds of healing modalities. Stretch, chiropractic, accupuncture, massage, physical therapy, on and on. Nothing provided lasting relief.

Then I read The Mindbody Prescription by John Sarno. I thought I'd share that as well because that book changed my life. Our minds and emotions are much stronger than most people realize.

Also the picture bottom right on your banner, check my banner.

That is what I see when the self disappears briefly. Well, not exactly, but it goes in that direction.

Will check the podcast

🫂💜

Yeah I saw our banners match 😃

Great chatting with you here. Feel free to reach out anytime 🫂

Well detailed. I feel your pain. On the same boat and I really understand 🫂

💜🫂