I wrote this a while back about happiness. It’s party of a bigger blog post but I thought I’d share this snippet. I’d write it a bit differently today but the core message would remain:

“Money does not bring happiness no matter what anyone says. It does relieve you of despair and help live a better, more peaceful and enjoyable life, but it will not make you happy.

Very few people in the world, if any, know true happiness because they confuse happiness (the process) with happiness (the end state). There is no end state for happiness.

When people ask you if you are happy, it's hard to answer, right?

Your instinct is to say "yes, of course". After all, your day is going fine, you have every comfort you desire and you had a pleasant lunch with a friend. You feel "happy".

But, this happiness fades. Tomorrow you get in a car accident, your car damaged, insurance won't pay out and you miss 2 weeks of work. You are "unhappy".

Some people confuse happiness with being content. You can be content with your place in life, but that doesn't mean you're happy.

The whole debate over happiness is a mute point. Since happiness is a process which is more akin to enjoyment, ultimately there is no such thing as happiness. The word itself should disappear from dictionaries.

Ok, I'm joking. But, you get the point.

When it comes to my life, I strive for satisfaction and contentment.

If I'm satisfied that day, that week, that month, that year, or the last decade, then I've met my "happiness" goals. If I am content with my life, then I'm "happy".

While material wealth can provide satisfaction, the contentment piece is often missing. With wealth, the goal post moves from one spot to another. Once you've achieved a satisfying moment, you have to move to the next, and the next. Each time you have to introduce higher states of satisfaction that require more effort and money.

Eventually, you plateau and satisfying moments from the physical world no longer matter. You seek out emotional attachment and relationships.

This is why so many wealthy people are depressed. No matter how much they spend, they can never reach that emotional attachment provided by love and relationships.

In fact, wealth only complicates those things. Instead of people seeing you for who you are as a person, a new variable is introduced and they see you for your status. With misaligned incentives, it becomes more difficult to form genuine relationships. Thus, contentment is hard to achieve.

I'm going to let you in on the biggest secret everyone is asking about - the secret to happiness.

The secret to happiness is charitable work. Doing things for others, without expecting anything in return.

Charitable acts are secretly selfish acts, whether that person acknowledges it or not.

All humans act in self-preservation. The need to feel good about ourselves. The need for approval. The need for comfort and safety. The need for recognition. All of these needs are driven by self-preservation.

Charity is no different. While we may feel that we do good things for others out of the goodness of our hearts, the evolutionary incentive is to feel satisfied by our deeds. There's nothing wrong with doing good things to feel good, as long as you understand why you're doing it, instead of performing mental gymnastics.”