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I don’t understand why there are so many men that are angry at women.

The angry women I get. I’m not justifying it or defending it, but I understand how it happens. The vast majority of the women I know have been violently assaulted, groped, harassed, graped, etc. and while diving into collectivism is never the answer, I can understand how those experiences would result in a general anger at men.

And yes there are subcultures where it is very popular to talk shit about men in general and that should cause some anger. But I would think being physically assaulted would appropriately cause a much higher level of anger, ya? But that's not what I'm seeing.

So what happened to these dudes? Why are they so angry?

Bill Cypher 5mo ago

Suicide rates? Poverty rates? Homelessness? Jail rates? Educational attainment? Odds of dying on the job? Odds of being murdered? On and on.

There are plenty social inequality reasons for men to be mad. Ignoring them or downplaying them because womens issues are more important to you only makes those problems worse and those men angrier.

Remember that life outcomes for men are u shaped on a graph. Most men are every bit as screwed by the system as women are.

Focusing on patriarchy instead of the Cantillionaire system is how they divide us. It is just another way to keep us fighting each other instead of our real enemy. No different than constantly blaming race when the country is littered with trailer parks full of white people below the poverty line too.

Don't fall for it.

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Discussion

MMA NEWS 5mo ago

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HannahMR 5mo ago

Do you believe in triage?

People being violently attacked is a more pressing issue than people being pressured into bad jobs. But certainly all of these things matter.

Bill Cypher 5mo ago

Ok, but as I pointed out murder victim rates are higher for men.

That is the problem with trying to play victim one upsmanship, we could go around arguing forever. So now you have to join my side or strawman away half the points I made. You chose option B.

It is perfectly fine for a female rape victim to care more about rape and a man who has been homeless and isn't a rapist to worry more about male homelessness.

Tell that guy "my problems are more important than yours you should worry about me first" doesn't get you an ally it gets you an enemy.

People who are at the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy are always going to put their own issues first. That doesn't make them evil, it makes them real human beings just trying to find a way to get by. Drive by punching down only makes the world a worse place.

purrs_for_Her 5mo ago

i think this is a bit outside what she's asking: why are so many men angry at women?

but most every issue you raised is primarily caused by other men...

Bill Cypher 5mo ago

That is true. It doesn't change the experience of a man who has repeatedly been a victim and never a perpetrator in that system. He won't feel any desire to put other peoples issues ahead of his own. He will feel mad when a group of people make their entire position how easy men have it and how men cause all the problems so something needs to be done to reign men in.

I'm not opposed to any of her statements about how women have problems, they do. I'm opposed to putting down men as a gender because it is sexist and it hurts her cause as well as the cause of men who were victims of societies violence.

purrs_for_Her 5mo ago

as a guy who is also stuck in the system (i won't label myself a victim, though very nearly was), and not a perpetrator, that's something i can understand. but i also understand that when women express their grievances, i can try to empathize instead of personalizing.

also, aren't the men getting mad at women for preferring to focus on women's issues (also primarily caused by men) falling into the same trap you described a few replies ago?

also, i'm not sure how she is putting down men as a gender..?

Bill Cypher 5mo ago

I absolutely think people on both sides are being inconsiderate of the other genders suffering.

I never begrudged her a chance to vent about the bad things that happen to women. I even follow her and read her every post. This OP crossed a line into being sexist itself so I spoke up, same as she often does when she spies sexism around her.

It was right there plain as day to me as a man to see that the reason she was looking for was the complete dismissal of their suffering that was right there in her own post. I haven't even asked what happened to you but I'm ready to declare I suffered more so I deserve to be mad and you don't.

She might not feel that is what she wrote. I know that is what a man who has been kicked while he was down 1 too many times read. So, I'm trying to answer the question.

I spent a lot of time in my life mad at women because of the things women have done to me and because of the way they were dismissive of my suffering caused by men. I came out the other side with a lot of scars.

I'm the guy. I know why because I hated women. I suspect she didn't want a real answer from someone with real problems, but was maybe fishing for a pat on the back. This is far more uncomfortable for everyone than a like would have been.

It isn't easy. If I'm honest the way she keeps using basic internet argument dodges to avoid seeing my point has me on the verge of walking away. A block and a distraction would be a lot easier for me.

purrs_for_Her 5mo ago

idk man, there seems to be a looooot of resentment here. perhaps there is some history between you two that i don't know about—it feels like you're assuming a lot of her motives. i haven't read anything that she's posted to be sexist, but i haven't read all of her notes either—She seems very egalitarian to me.

i'm not sure if you're aware or not, but this resentment you harbor is contributing to the very divide you are against...

wishing you peace and healing

Bill Cypher 5mo ago

Gender swap her positions in this conversation and see how it reads.

It is a man telling women that he has decided a problem that more often affects men is the most important problem to society. Triage means everyone should stop working on womens problems and work on this problem a man picked that more often affects men until men have decided that problem is solved. Any woman who is mad about that makes no sense at all because I a man have decided it is the most rational way to make society better.

Again, I have only said this for the sake of the gender swap test.

Any man who took that position in public for real would get roasted alive. Disclaimer before and after and I still bet the 2 women who are on nostr couldn't help but get mad reading it.

Bill Cypher 5mo ago

Gender swap her positions in this conversation and see how it reads.

Again, I have only said this for the sake of the gender swap test.

Any man who took that position in public for real would get roasted alive. Disclaimer before and after and I still bet the 2 women who are on nostr couldn't help but get mad reading it.