to yourself.

that's where the term self-regulation comes from.

just like parents calm down their kids, as grown ups we can calm down our "inner childs" (unprocessed defense mechanisms from childhood = root of fears).

compassion is rooted in the ventral vagal nervous system, which is the main mechanism that regulates the fight, flight, freeze, fawn parts of the ns.

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I tried that, and giving compassion to myself didn't stop me fearing my dad. Not one bit. That answer is a dead end.

I did find something that solved that permanently, however. Faith/trust in myself.

Con = with; fidence= trust or faith.

Compassion is great, but it is powerless in this situation.