"tell me what to do" (tell me what you need) is not as attractive as simply being attentive.
do you agree?
what would (or does) this look like for you?
#relationships #intimacy #grownostr #asknostr
Discussion
I don't think there could be anyone arguing against that point. You basically double dip, you prove that you are intent to spend some energy while simultaneously showing that you already spent some of your intellectual budget by thinking about it and/or being attentive.
BUT, that being said there is always the issue of a blank white paper vs paper with 30 drawn random circles. If your task is to draw anything on the paper, people tend to be more creative given the restrictions. #suchislife
So while being attentive goes a long way, being given restrictions/general guidance can have synergistic effects.
(also sorry for thread necromancy, it takes a while to find time to put on this kind of thinking cap)
no worries, fren~! i always welcome thoughtful responses. :3
you bring up a really important point about guidance and instructions and the importance of communication. and one i don't necessarily disagree with. a more assertive woman would probably find it easier to communicate those guidelines, however, i doubt that she'd consider a guy who passively awaits instructions as attractive.
i think when i asked this question i was thinking about "Her love language is not having to ask" and how this applies as a submissive man. many times i see taking initiative conflated with leadership, but in this context, at least to me, it's following—i'm following Her cues, i'm learning what She likes and following Her desires, my intent is to please Her by paying attention to the nonverbal communication and the small details in everyday conversation. the initiative is separate from leading.
to me, i think this arrangement is a common form of Feminine leadership—it focuses more on intuition and connection to inspire the masculine partner to act rather than direct commands.
idk, i don't have it all figured out; just something i was thinking about.
thanks again~! ^.^