I prefer Phoenix for self custody, but there is no LNURL so you can’t use it on Nostr to receive. There are trade offs with everything, no silver bullet. Open a fat channel on Phoenix and that’s your best bet in my opinion. Forced channel closing is an issue and could happen. There is no way around that even running your own lightning node. Part of the decision you have to make to use the network.
Discussion
That's a fair answer. Two more questions. What is "fat"? 1 M?
Will this ever get fixed/changed so plebs don't loose funds on channel closures? It must be frustrating as fuck and possibly damaging when you are a merchant for example.
I would say over 1MM sats, yes. It’s not only plebs that lose funds. Big liquidity providers get forced closed too. It’s unfortunate, but part of the reality. Everyone is welcome to use Visa,
pay 3%, be KYC’d, and get a devaluing currency as well. You just have to choose what network you want to be on.
Use nostr:npub1mutnyacc9uc4t5mmxvpprwsauj5p2qxq95v4a9j0jxl8wnkfvuyque23vg self custodial like Phoenix but plus members get a LNURL. Closest wallet to a silver bullet that I've seen so far and I've used almost all of them. You can also use mutiny like a custodial wallet if you want super cheap fees and no force closure by using Esats on a fedimint built into the wallet.