So aggregators like Nostr.wine are probably valuable to you, by making sure you’re getting data from many places over one connection?
Discussion
It definitely seems to help. Paying for wine has kept notes & replies available fairly consistent but I still often don't see zaps, reactions, or reply counts. Shutting off certain relays helps to an extent but figuring out which & for where has been a lot of trial & error.
They are my favorite relay for that reason.