... kind of like Fiat world and the collection of people I'd rather not hang out with.

I'll choose my relay(s) the same way I select events/occasions I attend. If there's good people, high signal a low noise, I'll look forward to the interaction. When I can no longer hang with those like minded individuals because they've chosen to follow "the popular kids" on the megacorp relay, l'll move on in the same I do when many of our favorite things become commercialized.

I know I can't prevent everything I willingly offer to the relay to be exclusive and private anymore than I can prevent someone from over hearing my conversation in public. If privacy is a must, I'll govern myself accordingly. That's on me not a protocol. Give me the open source and let me figure it out. I like that better than censorship, rules and mandates.

Ultimately, if the client(s) I use sell me out, I'll go elsewhere or build one myself.