How do you tell an old friend that you just dont have time for his manic shit anymore and that you're happy to get his texts and chat on the phone from time to time but you're just never going to let him around your family?
Discussion
You invite him to a party, but before he walks in, dump all the food bowls in containers and put it in the refrigerator and act like you didn't make enough. Then ask your wife to give him and his wife the cold shoulder until she gets pissed off and makes him leave early. He will never haunt your door again.
You can’t outsource your emotional labor. It’s not rejection, it’s prioritizing what sustains you and your loved ones.
This is what you’re doing. This is why I don’t want it around my family. This is why I like you and enjoy your friendship, these are the boundaries we going with unless I can trust you to comport yourself in a certain way around my kids.
“Hey bud, I don’t have time for your manic shit anymore. Shoot me a text and we can talk now and then but I really don’t want you around my family”😎
I have a friend like that. He has a drinking problem. Everyone in the friend group gradually stopped inviting him to events. At one point we told him he had a problem and needed help. He still calls weekly but until he takes care of the problem it’ll stay that way
