Chuck Norris once raced the earth around the sun and won by three years.

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Chuck Noriss once recorded himself masturbating.

Now, he only masterbates when watching that video.

Chuck Norris once threw a grenade and killed 100 men, after that the grenade exploded.

When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents slept in his bed when they were scared

Chuck Norris delivered himself.

Chuck Norris once donated at a sperm bank…the entire building got pregnant.

Chuck Norris has a diary, it is called the Guinness Book Of World Records.

Chuck Norris once spun a ball on his finger, to this day planet earth continues to turn.