The proper way to forgive parent given trauma is to overcome the consequences of their sin in your life, and then shift posture towards one of sympathy, and finally allow your heart to totally and completely forgive them.

You can't really forgive your parents until you pay down the debts that they gave you. The negative feelings will just keep recurring. You need to solve the problems they didn't or couldn't. Then you can move past it.

For example: if you had a weak dad who did not lead the household, maybe got a divorce, and projected huge ripple effects of negative consequences, then you yourself need to become a strong dad who leads.

In a way, you must become strong enough to pick up the cross they set down. Then you can move on.

#MasculineFrame

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Amen🙏

Beautifully said.

Truth ☝🏼🧡

Damn, this is good. Incredible advice.

“pick up the cross they set down”

Profoundly true, and the only real solution to overcoming the generational damage from the baby boomers (themselves the rotten fruit of prior generations of secular lukewarm Christians)

And it is exactly what Christ is calling us to do, through Him,

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

~ Matthew 11:28-30

I get where you’re coming from but I think the Christian message is that Christ transforms me and gives me new life able to do what I couldn’t before (like forgive someone). When I understand how much he forgave me, that forgives is available to others without a long process or progression of work I must do to get there. The only cross I must pick up is Christ’s and he says his yoke is light. If the yoke is heavy, I’m carrying a burden that isn’t mine to carry. I pray for everyone with bad earthly parents that their parents bad example is not a hindrance to the comport and peace available in simply knowing a perfect Heavenly Father.

It let's you do things you couldn't, like overcome sin and forgive/call to repentance sinners.