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This woman is 💯 correct!

You don't call out a person you are dating a narcissist, when you are dating one... and if they are really one. You would be so caught up in mental stress and isolated...that if it ever cross your mind you would freeze terrified with his/her reaction.

https://video.nostr.build/ea83b1a0d5acc4177333bb8fb37ad79cc2962e22e9bd0a7b862ec2fc92822f22.mp4

You do not want to deal with the aftermath of doing it...these people can be very dangerous and your body will stress in survival mode ...

People in these connections, leave...In total silence and without waves ! Some even get new identities and go into protection programs.

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Discussion

purrs_for_Her 5mo ago

omg this is so accurate

these terms get thrown around and dilute the true meaning.

sometimes people are just selfish a-holes and it's as simple as that.

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Surrealistic Menina 5mo ago

Exactly! I am getting a little bit tired of listening the term being thrown around also. People that have dealt with NPDs or cluster B, usually are so caught up in healing, distress or even trying to make a life out of the destruction of self, that they have no time to thid drama altogether. I am honestly coming to the conclusion that most of the posts that we see are really the abusers online, trying to make themselves victims of the abuse they continuaslly perpretait. It's evil and mind-blowing and they do get, this way, what they seek: supply, validation, attention etc...

Surrealistic Menina 5mo ago

Your point is also correct. Some people are just plain simple players and jerks. But some, by the way they talk, respond and the energy we can feel they send out, are definitely still the abusers getting a kick out from the reaction of people.

purrs_for_Her 5mo ago

this is accurate.

but speaking from my own experience, the times i became most hurtful (through shutdown, withdrawal, dismissal, etc.) were the times that i was hurting and/or protecting my ego.

it wasn't intentional—it was a reactive pattern that i hadn't recognized. i wasn't able to be vulnerable with my partner because being vulnerable was punished in my early experiences. and because i was being protective and framing myself as a victim, i wasn't able to give love or receive it.

this doesn't excuse my behavior, but it does offer insight about how hurt people hurt people...

and i think the more malicious people take advantage of this.

Brisket 5mo ago

It's profitable to play he victim & harvest the sympathy.

I find this victim position manipulative & disempowering (for the alleged victim).

I will never reinforce a person's victim story.

🫂

purrs_for_Her 5mo ago

yep

and victim narratives are also a defense of ego.