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Zen<3lofi
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Would you rather have the trait of invisibility or insensibility, or both, or neither, and why? ๐Ÿก Not here to argue with the infinite opinions. Not here to โ€œbuild an audienceโ€, but to literally use this for โ€œnotes and other stuffโ€ (maybe Iโ€™m here to rebuild my sense of self โ€ฆ after a bunch of changes, experienced as traumatic) โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿฉน๐Ÿ’ โœ๏ธ I would like these to not exist: - poverty - pollution in LCOL areas - factory farms, slaughterhouses - war

Wondering: should I get the charger port of my iphone SE fixed? Or, get a secondhand iphone 13?

I think the first choice is sensible, but the second choice is more exciting.

sometimes I think I self-censor myself unnecessarilyโ€ฆ but it is also important to be thoughtful about what you say online. Although, social media is meant to be more casual.

lol itโ€™s a compliment!

also, have you seen some peopleโ€™s profiles around here? Their โ€˜about meโ€™ blurb is a long list of labels ๐Ÿท๏ธ

yeah I read his tweets several times and his โ€œhonest criticismsโ€ donโ€™t make sense to me. Like, take a look at the โ€œall timeโ€ graph? Not the โ€œ1 yearโ€ one?

I like โ€œthink lessโ€ haha (no โ€˜sโ€™) โ€ฆ referring to clearing the mind at times

โ€œHeathensโ€ by AURORA

Been thinking about verse 2 of this song, in relation to the zen buddhism teaching of โ€˜nonattachment to the outcomeโ€™ and injustice.

Replying to Avatar calle

๐Ÿฅœ๓ …“๓ …‘๓ …ฃ๓ …˜๓ …ฅ๓ „ฒ๓ …Ÿ๓ „ข๓ „ถ๓ …ค๓ …•๓ „ณ๓ „บ๓ …Ÿ๓ …”๓ „ธ๓ …‚๓ …ง๓ …“๓ …ช๓ …Ÿ๓ …ฆ๓ „ผ๓ „ข๓ „ก๓ … ๓ …’๓ …ž๓ …๓ …ฅ๓ …’๓ …‡๓ …œ๓ …ฅ๓ …‘๓ …‡๓ „บ๓ … ๓ …”๓ „ธ๓ „ฝ๓ …ฅ๓ …‰๓ „ข๓ „ถ๓ …ช๓ …‘๓ „ณ๓ „ฉ๓ „ณ๓ …‘๓ …ˆ๓ …‚๓ …š๓ …’๓ „ข๓ …œ๓ …ฅ๓ …‰๓ …ˆ๓ …†๓ …š๓ …“๓ „ข๓ „ถ๓ „ ๓ …‰๓ …ˆ๓ …ƒ๓ „ฒ๓ …Ÿ๓ …๓ „ถ๓ … ๓ …ƒ๓ „ฑ๓ „ฒ๓ …๓ „ฒ๓ …†๓ „ด๓ …ง๓ …ƒ๓ ……๓ „ถ๓ „ท๓ …‰๓ …ˆ๓ „ณ๓ „ฒ๓ …Ÿ๓ „ข๓ „ถ๓ …˜๓ „ท๓ „ต๓ „ฒ๓ …˜๓ …“๓ „ฃ๓ …˜๓ „ฑ๓ „ฝ๓ „ท๓ …‚๓ …œ๓ „ฝ๓ …„๓ …›๓ …ง๓ „ฟ๓ „ท๓ „พ๓ …œ๓ …‰๓ …ช๓ …Š๓ …›๓ „ฝ๓ „ด๓ …†๓ …™๓ …Š๓ …„๓ „ฝ๓ „ค๓ „ฝ๓ …๓ „บ๓ …˜๓ …Š๓ …š๓ …‰๓ „ ๓ „ฝ๓ …„๓ „พ๓ …๓ „พ๓ „ด๓ …‰๓ „ ๓ …Š๓ „ด๓ …“๓ „ข๓ „ฟ๓ „ด๓ …”๓ …œ๓ „ฝ๓ …ช๓ „น๓ …จ๓ „ฝ๓ „ด๓ „ฒ๓ …™๓ „ฝ๓ „ท๓ „น๓ „ค๓ …Š๓ „ท๓ „บ๓ …œ๓ „ฟ๓ „ท๓ …‚๓ …™๓ „พ๓ „ข๓ „ฝ๓ …จ๓ …‰๓ …š๓ …”๓ …๓ „ฝ๓ …๓ …‰๓ …ช๓ „ฝ๓ …๓ „ถ๓ …š๓ „พ๓ „ท๓ „ถ๓ …š๓ …‡๓ „ณ๓ „ต๓ „ณ๓ „บ๓ …จ๓ „ง๓ …™๓ …ƒ๓ „ ๓ „ถ๓ …ค๓ „ต๓ „จ๓ …ง๓ …›๓ …ค๓ „ง๓ …š๓ „ค๓ …ช๓ …š๓ …‡๓ „ฆ๓ „จ๓ „ฟ๓ „ฟ๓ „ผ๓ „ฉ๓ …ˆ๓ …œ๓ …ˆ๓ …•๓ …—๓ …ง๓ „ข๓ „ฟ๓ …๓ …–๓ …–๓ „ง๓ …›๓ „ฒ๓ …ข๓ …ก๓ …ข๓ …‰

https://cdn.nostrcheck.me/bcc2d3e87984819abb0ec7905ad523c782adb877136bbabce822996c5dfdfd36.mp4

what? that is a cool idea!

Anxiety, and social anxiety can make things more difficult than it needs to be. (ahem, Inside Out 2)

Like, with my sister, and my aunt, if I had zero anxiety about it, I could just say whatโ€™s on my mind and see what happens.

With my dadโ€™s thing, itโ€™s not so much anxiety as โ€ฆ non-attachment. And setting a firm boundary for whenever his speaking style starts to get abusive and blamey.

I think my dad dropping off some snacks with my sister, which was supposed to be for LNY, and which I needed to go and pick up, made me sad. The objects gifted emphasized the absence of a relationship, in a way. But in another way, they are also a reassuring reminder that we care about each other. And a reminder of shared memories relating to foods and meals.

just remember: everyone has a complex journey in life.

And itโ€™s like a braid, woven in are also happy times, simple things.

Today, my brain is focused on the negatives more, for some reason

trigger warning . . . #griefsupport

#vent

Family members have gotten weird after someone dies. My mom died, and that was unexpected. Itโ€™s been 8 years. My dadโ€™s behavior changed. My sisterโ€™s behavior changed. Just this past September, my grandma died (my momโ€™s mom). And my aunt and my cousinโ€™s behavior changed. My cousin spoke to me and my sister in a really weird way about waiving our inheritance rights. I wasnโ€™t even aware that there was an inheritance. Never thought about it, it never came up. My parents never explained anything about that type of thing.

Just feeling very depressed about it today.

It just feels like the loss does not end with the person who died. You lose others too because they start to behave in an โ€˜unhumanโ€™ way. Or, in ways I do not understand.

I saw a video yesterday where it seems the Bhutan govt. is really helping people with bitcoin.

not sure about individuals who donโ€™t have that much themselves thoโ€ฆ except maybe to talk about it in a way that feels natural to themselves

thanks! Yeah I did realize that. I just often find myself copy and pasting to post the same thing on various platforms. oh well. At least it helps me to remember and think about what Iโ€™m posting more.

Iโ€™ve been reading The Sketchbook by Washington Irving which was written about 200 years ago, and itโ€™s interesting to see the similarities and differences to life today.

similarities: needing to make money, class distinctions, existential anxiety and sadness about loss, boredom and lack of purpose, โ€ฆ

differences: gender roles are unquestioned โ€ฆ

so hopefully the future has way less gender roles and roles are based more on individual traits, less class distinctions, less of a need to work so much

it does for me! I occasionally use the option to slow it down, like .75 or something. Whatever that one lower option is.