Gooood Moaning!
π« Have a wonderful day π«
https://video.nostr.build/a5a3cb93efe390b49960c6b8e79cb8b18139b6864ac7964b3e670f0db0a504e2.mp4
A great insight
#FoodForThought
Gooood Moaning!
π« Have a wonderful day π«
https://video.nostr.build/a5a3cb93efe390b49960c6b8e79cb8b18139b6864ac7964b3e670f0db0a504e2.mp4
A great insight
#FoodForThought
I liked that. It can be a dangerous one for those who are naturally self reflective and emotionally responsible, but ultimately who is incapable of facing their shadows will never face anyone else's.
In the artist aspect of it I actually have seen all angles. One of my closest friends is like the video says, but my dad was an artist, and he passed away never admitting his wrongdoings (which were far beyond stealing a sweet in a shop). I loved him, don't get me wrong, but he could rewrite the narrative in his mind so completely that he was always the victim - and he believed that story above all else. We never heard an apology, an acknowledgement, or any real accountability. For 40 years he cheated, neglected, reacted, yet in his eyes, he was always the one wronged.
I know for certain that at some point he really was a victim; his trauma built powerful coping mechanisms. But those same mechanisms meant others paid the price for his inability to confront himself. He cared in his own way though - he would help with any project big or small, buy gifts for everyone whenever he had some money, teach others what he knewβ¦ but then wouldnβt come see his own children because he βhad to water the marijuana plants.β π
I can only imagine his internal battles, but truth is it's impossible to live with someone whose mind is trapped in such loop because if they are unable to understand that they can, indeed, be harmful to others through their actions (or lack thereof) and behaviours, they will never ever put in the work to face their own shadow.
But now to what matters most... HAVE A GREAT FRIDAY! ππ₯³
Such a beautiful insight Jules, thanks for sharing !
My father would not visit kids because my mother was responsible for situation ( divorce).
Life is amazing, hence the one he would fight more and keep distance because I was the only one who would call up on his "excuses" is actually the one that brought him home and taking care of him....
I can see in his eyes what he is incapable of saying out loud.
the victim narrative is so hard to shake because part of it does rest in the truth of experience. it's whole purpose is to protect the egoβto avoid the pain of taking responsibility for the harm that actions or inaction have caused.
but on the other side of a victim narrative is tremendous growth and healing. <3
thanks for sharing this piece of yourself with us, Juls. if only we had the power to save people from themselves... but maybe it's better that way. at least we can change ourselves.
Yes 100%. The pain of taking accountability for their actions is so unbearable that their minds rewrite history so it's never their responsibility to take, it's always happened differently, it's always been someone else's fault. That's guaranteed insanity for their partners and loved ones, but it doesn't make them bad people.
I couldn't agree with you more ππ«
A good anology is people who are asleep, and rather stay sleeping than to wake up. I am not sure if some are capable of waking up....
Some are, but the ones that are on "automatic pilot", believing that they are doing nothing wrong I am not sure.
I have been thinking about it.
I read a lot that it's not possible but something tells me maybe they can?
I am not sure if it's only wishful thinking.
I understand and I also choose to believe they can... It's just is only possible if they want to go through the pain of doing so, and accepting that we are all human, we aren't perfect but we must take accountability for our shortcomings, to learn and not repeat them. Otherwise without true understanding of our actions the patterns will just continue... It doesn't make us "less than" to make mistakes and there is so much we can learn from how those who love us express themselves towards us.
I like the way you put it on this note. I think the bottom line is the willingness of the person. Sometimes a new context helps them see, a specific person helps them sail through that pain and they ultimately help each other...
Like πββ¬, one sure thing is we can do that shadow work for ourselves β¨