ladies, what makes you feel safe in a relationship?
#relationships #asknostr
Discussion
Fart and poop acceptance
not being in one
i was thinking of a way to respond to this, but really, this is a completely valid and understandable answer.
there were times when i failed to ensure that my partner's, my Wife's, safety was a priority. not because i was loud, or aggressive, or violent, but because i wasn't present emotionally.
and sometimes i wonder if She had a similar thought: that She'd feel safer without me. that failure is something that i have to carry forever. and all i can do is wake up everyday and do my best to make sure She never has a thought like that going forward.
thanks for sharing <3
It's really beautiful that you're being so considerate toward your partner. When both people in a relationship truly care for and prioritize each other’s well-being and sense of safety, I believe things can work out well.
Unfortunately, I’ve had partners who showed aggression and jealousy. I’ve always disliked conflict. I just can't handle it. Those experiences were painful and left a deep impact on me. That’s why I’m extremely cautious now, and honestly, I often prefer being alone.
it is unfortunate that you had bad experiences like that. my Wife and i were both very lucky to find each other.
She feels the same as you about conflict, which is why i think She was open to an FLR—it allows Her to set the pace of the relationship and be the architect of a space that feels safe without having to make Herself small.
thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences, and thank you for the kind words. :3
I think at the most basic level it's being able to communicate without judgement.
It happened when I was still trying to sell the yacht for sale and got a tricky client—he still comforted me sweetly even when I was in a funk.