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pollyanna
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I'm doing this intensively every day for some years and I surprise myself all the time with feelings I was supressing. it's not easy to really accept we can feel whatever comes, we are not used to that in general. since we were kids we learned to run away from feelings, to distract ourselves instead of staying, feeling whatever comes and testifying a transformation that opens us to create freely.

we can only see the past from the present. if there's something for you to learn from the past, your body will show you right now. in my experience, we just project the past in the future cause we couldn't (for many reasons) feel something in the past. so we keep living the same story so we have the chance to feel. and the way to change that is feeling whatever comes. feeling what you're feeling right now. does this seem strange?

maybe it's not something to learn or a place to be, but just remembering: here you are.

At the beginning of the year, some birds made a nest in the window of the room where we sleep when we visit my mother.

I've seen some eggs passing by there, the birds growing and disappearing. This time, on my daughter's birthday, I saw one of the birds finishing pulling its head out of the egg (I didn't see it when it came out, just the attempt and then I saw it already out of the egg). and yesterday I saw them risking flying and I took those photos.

Hi, Lois! you're so nice to me! I felt like you were giving me a warm hug.

my son is almost 3 and my daughter is 6! hahaha they were doing other poses but I don't really know the yoga poses 😬 so they could be doing one of them hahaha

thank you for telling me that! haha it made me remember that is totally normal to worry about those things. when I saw you photography for the first time I was like wow, what a nice body ahahaha 😬 you're beautiful, and not just because of the picture, you know.

thank you so much for all that! for reading what I wrote with so loving eyes, for doing this you're doing! ❤️

an unconditional action.

someone, in an instant of awareness and connection with everything, opens space for an action to emerge that benefits everyone and everything.

I started on Sunday but only practiced 3 times.

the first day was strange. I tried to record that but that was very hard for me because it brought to light what I tried to hide from myself for so long: the appearance of my body. it was so hard to see that I was worried about that, I felt so shallow. but that's what happened.

I practiced again only on the day 3. I think I was afraid to face that thoughts and worries. I was not ok with that. but during the practice I started to accept the thoughts and let them go a few times. and I could pay attention to the movements of my body, to my strength, to the process instead of the result. and I started to write about it that day.

later I couldn't find the time when I was alone to do that. because handstand for me was like something so intimate.

the next day was today. I was almost skipping today's practice, but I looked in the mirror and decided not to record, but to see my practice in the mirror. my daughter and my son was around so I couldn't really pay so much attention to my thoughts, but I felt like something changed within me, cause I was ok with them seen my practice. and when that ended we had an amazing time together. ❤️

the practice is taking me to what I tried not to face: the surface of my body, the lines that bring it to material life, what I can see of my body. to face my body's appearance and to look at it with resting eyes is my challenge for now I guess.

I read your text on your website. it's amazing. so beautiful image of the sitar. that's exactly what I've experienced with my emotions and that's where authenticity starts - feeling whatever you're feeling each moment. ❤️

yesterday my ego was hurt cause I thought someone was angry at me and was avoiding me. I told this to a friend and she reminded me that it was someone's feelings (if it's not my projection, cause it can be) and I should accept them as they are, but, of course, feeling sad about that is also ok. so I could let go the resistance to feel what I was feeling and was more open to embrace what the other supposedly feels.

observing my resistance to feel is mostly what I do daily. thank you so much for sharing this ❤️

the space that appears when we cease efforts to be and live something other than what we experience now

good morning! 🌻 I love the universe of dreams. ❤️ I think they are a wonderful source of self-knowledge. if you want to talk about yours, you know I'm here ☺️

to learn how to learn we just need to unlearn or distrust what school taught us about what learning is.

a castle of forgotten creatures in the sea and the reflection of the moon. when the creatures see it, they remember who they are.

on my daughter's sixth birthday, my son and I watched this scene. the little bird came out of the egg a few minutes after I recorded that.

this is the window in the room where we sleep when we go to my mother's house.

❤️

https://video.nostr.build/80d762a8f6d7f8b125ba17db95e89b689d8aea22004e367dadb8bd76a9b95c52.mp4