So, have plenty of experience with being traumatized by betrayals and what not. The lesson I learn again and again, is that I am stronger than I think I am. What that leads to, is that it doesn’t hurt me in the end. You develop immunity and manage to recover quickly. Trusting others (within reason) is a strength and virtue, so work on developing it. In the end it is between you and yourself, and as long as you can trust yourself, you can trust others. Learn to be self-sufficient and learn to be the one who opens the road toward trust by being the first to demonstrate trust. Hope that helps! 🐶🐾🫂💜

Not able to trust the one you’re with is a terrible miserable way to live.

Give, love, serve for sake of yourself and not to receive and not without expectations.

You take your responsibility for choosing bad people in your life in the past, and try to not repeat that mistake.

To love deeply, you must be willing to set the forest on fire, and trust that the green shoots of seedlings will sprout again.

Everything happens for a reason, whether you like it or not.

Most times you won’t understand why it happened but down the road things begin to unfold that are meant to happen.

Don’t close your heart off, every broken heart needs time to heal and grow.

There are lessons to learn along the way and always keep your heart open as you just don’t know when you will meet the one for you.

There’s a saying;

‘The Buddhists say if you meet somebody and your heart pounds, your hands shake, your knees go weak, that's not the one. When you meet your 'soul mate' you'll feel calm. No anxiety, no agitation.’

Never been IN love. Sorry, but I can't really give you any kind of valid perspective on that aspect of your post. But, I've been through plenty of betrayals. Plenty! Most of which were caused by family members. Betrayal, from my experience, teaches us to recognize who is a genuine friend or loved one. The trauma that we experience from betrayal teaches us how important and valuable it is to have a high level of independence, as well as how crucial it is to possess the capacity of being able to survive and support yourself on your own. Zero codependence. Trauma should never be permanent and is more of a learning experience in the sense that it helps us realize how mentally strong we can be and how much willpower and ambition we have as an individual.

time heals wounds, not completely but enough.

The only cure for trauma is acceptance.

Radical acceptance is a good book on the topic.

If it was done by one (toxic or dangerous) person, ask why you should go back to this relationship at all. Learn from it and try not to carry destructive patterns further - but remember where to find red flags next time.

Since trauma can become very destructive (for me it's overeating, snapping and neurosis badly influencing my health), there's psyllocybin and guided therapy to help. Or at least normal therapy helps well (and should go before any meds or drugs), to sort it out and talk it out.

Gabor Mate is very good on trauma, he was at Joe Rogan's. Check it out on Spotify or him on YouTube.

The antidote to fear is confidence (i.e. trust/faith). It is possible to love completely after being heartbroken, even after multiple subsequent heartbreaks. It does take facing your fears, and learning what part of yourself to trust, or have faith in. However, it is totally possible. We can grow out of patterns that no longer serve us, if we make steps toward that goal. It may not be easy, but it is within reach.

"Time is on your side. Yes it it is"

Forgiveness, forgiveness, forgiveness

Turn to God and ask him to help you forgive without an apology from the other. Learn from the experience, but forgive, don’t make excuses for them but forgive.

It’s a super natural act, you have to ask for help. But once you do you can begin to heal.

I've been broken, not sure I'll ever come up for air

There are certain things like this in which I consider psychedelic chamanic therapy is one of the greatest technologies one can use.

Because we can talk about it, we can rationalize it, we can sort of comprehend and understand certain things about what happened and what we want and why.

Yet to turn around physiology psyche, awareness, knowingness the whole mind spirit complex into a view of the facts and their meanings in a large scale is something you can only achieve through plant medicine and ancient wisdom. And planet earth wisdom through plant medicine, like the intelligence of life embedded in a chemical message exact for you. Applicable to all situations of your existence.

I mean it's not something that you cannot achieve going to your psychologist, changing habits, and meditating etc. But to integrate the whole wisdom that you can acquire from it into a single experience lasting a couple of hours... that is efficient. Of course if your intention is true.

And it's not something that you rationalize or you have to repeat a mantra a trillion times to understand. Wisdom and learning is placed and written into the DNA and you come out as another being. With a map for everyday life in which you know what to do, how to behave, how to repair what was broken through action. That is the process of integration of the experience. And it might take your whole life to do.

But it is like knowing certain river takes you where good life you want and wisdom is.

You have two options.

Either you enter step by step, knowing one of your legs is afraid and walking backwards and half of your body is in doubt, and when you have to swim, you swim against the current for a period of time, etc.

Or you set your intention to heal with determination and you jump straight ahead and swim with the aid of the river with all your members aligned, your mind, your surrendered being whole into the revelatory experience.

Of course always heart open is better.

We can comprehend.

But how do you speak to your traumatized cells in your body?

How do you write them new code?

How do you understand and foresee and sense the benefits of doing it in a timeless scale?

How do you resignify what happened to you in the most loving way? No judgement, no regrets, pure valoration and inclusion?

How do you answer all those questions with actions through your life without forgetting or falling asleep again in the nightmare? Because memories in our cells are so smart and strong. They create all messages. They have multilayered security keys and passwords.

Chamanic therapy is like logging in.

Signing of a contract. Assuming a commitment. Humility and surrendering to a higher wisdom trusting it is wanting to help you...

Well ....

Open heart always.

Always thankful

The last time I had my heart broken, I had to focus on myself (the time as i discovered stoicism). At first you begin to think about the mistakes you have made, but in the end its a consensus of two parties. Try to implement the good things you learned in the relationship and analyze the mistakes.

Try to keep your heart wide and open - be always yourself, dont disguise as a different person.

I have no fear for coming or not coming relationships - i live and love my life. It's nice to be alone, equally it can be wonderful to share time together and build something. 😊

I think all trauma fades with the passage of time, and really few other things. There is dilution with something new, but the new relationship is often tainted with the old.