How much do we talk and act according to the other person's gender, age, cultural background, etc.? A lot of time perceived and even stereotypical ones.
Why are we not just acting the same with everyone? Just being ourselves?
More importantly, do you talk differently with men and women?? I'm curious.
Good question… it’s hard to be self aware. I’m almost certain I subconsciously change my communication approach depending on who I’m talking too though
Of course we do lol you crazy? 😂
Can’t talk to women the same way we talk to men.
Lol you crazy
Why tho?
Do you think men and women's brains are exactly the same?
If the answer is no, then how do you think they became different?
I dunno. Too philosophical lol. What's your answer to that?
But I meant was do we start talking differently based on the other person's gender?
I think male and female brains are different, and I think we evolved to detect the gender of the other person and treat them differently based on that. We don't necessarily HAVE to, but it's our biological proclivity and it's difficult to overcome.
I want to add to this. A man talking to another man who happens to be his boss will sound very different than it would talking to a stranger. It’s all circumstantial.
Sure.
hmm interesting!
I'd like to hear more about this.
We’re just different. If I started talking to a girl about fantasy football, she’d probably get bored. If the same girl talked to me about makeup I wouldn’t care.
Not the content only. But how you talk.
Of course you can talk the same way if you are authentic speaking with integrity at all times. No point to change facades when you can be your true self!
Respect and decorum changes with different contexts and persons.
People have to earn access to trust, to respect, to attention and intimacy, etc.
Courtesy isn't being inauthentic, it's showing love, a desire not to offend, a deference to the other.
🙏
Do this all the time. Feels like I’m almost a different person around some friends than others. I don’t know.. maybe it’s like.. we form ourselves temporarily into what seems like the right shape for the relationship, and go on to do that again somewhere else. I don’t find it tiresome, but I do find it frustrating sometimes when it seems like the person wouldn’t be interested in talking to my other shapes. Especially the shapes that love bitcoin 😂
But I think you’re 100% right. What if I don’t like the version of person they are around me very much… but if I were a different version of myself around them more they’d adapt (and maybe even feel liberated) and we’d be better friends?!
Aww...
Interested in the shape that loves Bitcoin should be a requirement haha
Those are valid and good questions.
I used to be more like how you are. I think it is a gift to naturally adapt to our environment (aka friends' ways) but I like how now I'm more centered in myself. Though I might add or subtract things i say with different people, but I don't morph into some different versions of myself with different people any more. (Not saying you're doing this.)
Do you find you get along with fewer people that way? That’s my worry. Trying to meet them how they are rather than where I’d like to be
well, I do meet them where they are without intentionally censoring myself. It's a place I reached that I can be true to myself and allow them to be themselves at the same time.
Like we don't have to agree on things but we can both state what our beliefs are and still be friends or friendly with each other.
Does that make sense?
I hardcore cut out toxic people. But other than that, I look for commonalities to connect on. So, I don't think I'm connecting with less people.
Another thought is that it’s always such a joy to get through those first moments of feeling a person out only to find out that deep down you are very similar. Throwing away the social baggage and getting into things for real is so fun
Aww that's beautiful!! 🫂🫂
This is a long video, but Tolle explains role playing well in my opinion
Thank you, fren. I'll give it a watch.
yes, I def talk different to men and women. i've found that acknowledging my audience's gender is key in not making a fool of myself lol. like memes i've shared on IG with a community of mostly women have hit very differently when shared on nostr with an audience of mostly men. and personally, i've talked about things with you that I wouldnt talk about with most men. it's not about me abandoning parts of myself, but more about what's appropriate given the context and me sharing chosen parts of myself. however, there is the chance that I don't share something that is appropriate and it's a missed opportunity but as of this moment im okay with this bc I trust my gut. 🫂💜
Okay, maybe I should've just said this from the get go. Now this note is getting many misunderstandings.
I've been chatting with someone (don't want to reveal whom, unless you wanna identify yourself. And as we talked about, I'm coolel with this misunderstanding, anyways...) that I thought was a woman, but turned out to be a man. But our convos holds true, so that made me wonder does gender really matter in some cases and how much we modify our convos based on the other person's gender??
What if we didn't? Maybe we could land something beautiful.
#thoughtstr
