📄 CONFIDENTIAL DOSSIER
Re: Monetary Identity of Donald J. Trump
Filed by: Fort Nakamoto, Department of Satirical Affairs 🏰⚔️
Classification: Extremely Fiat
🪙 After extensive meme-based intelligence gathering, our field operatives have confirmed the following aliases in use across Bitcoin territory:
• The Shitcoiner in Chief
• Peg Lord Supreme
• King of the Custodial Coup
• The Stable Khan
• First of His Name, Guardian of the Fiat Gateway
• The Tether Tyrant
• Commander-in-Stable
• The Off-Ramp Overlord
• Degen of Denominations
• Magister of Middlemen
• His Excellency, The Wrapped President
• Signer of the Executive Multisig
• Sir Not-Your-Keys-Not-Your-Country
We detected no seed phrase activity, no cold storage strategy, and zero commitment to memetic decentralization.
This is not your sat-stacking sovereign.
This is fiat’s final cosplay before hyperbitcoinization.
End memo. Resume sipping permacoffee.
#FortNakamoto #StablecoinSultan #MemeCheckpointDeployed #NotMyPresidentMyNode